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Wednesday, March 31st, 2004
12:21 am - Miss you
I miss you I miss you I miss you I miss you lots I miss you I miss you I miss you I miss you I miss you I miss you I need you I miss you I miss you I miss you I miss you I miss you I miss you I miss you I miss you I miss you I miss you I miss you I miss you I miss you I miss you I kiss you I miss you I miss you I miss you I miss you I miss you I miss you I wish you I miss you I miss you I miss you I miss you I miss you I miss you I miss you I miss you I miss you I can type all day and still not have you beside me.

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Tuesday, November 11th, 2003
6:11 pm - HAPPY BIRTHDAY BABY!
HellloOOOoooo my love!!! My delicious! My darling wonder! It is the bestest, brightest and most beautiful day beause today we celebrate the joyous moment of your birth. The day God sent you down to our drab planet with the fate of funking it up! You're my purple pimpin' love machine. You cannot help but enchant everyone you meet. I am the luckiest girl on earth. Not only for having met you, but being blessed to know you so intimately. I hope the day sparkles with dripping sunlight, spiral clouds and opalesent skies. I hope that friends adorn you in silk robes dyed rich colours of saffron and ruby. I hope that festivities are held in your honour across cities and towns. May we look to the heavens and chant the glory of your name and the blessing you are to all of us. I hope that family surrounds you in fields of kisses and mountains of hugs. May you rise up like a golden wind and zoom about in the stars, even if for one day.

When you're up and about, contact me on ICQ or email or phone and I'll take you on a special birthday date. That is if you have time. But, don't worry. If birthday fun and surprises sweep you away, we can have our date another day. Because this is a mystical journey that exists separate to this realm, thus normal parameters of time and space do not constrict or restrict us. ;)

WheeeeEEEeeee!
All my big birthday snuggles
LOVE YOU!
Your Grrl.

current mood: jubiliant

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Thursday, October 16th, 2003
6:07 pm - A Shiver in a Magazine
Today on the Subway in New York I saw a teenage boy hunched over a new magazine, eyes six inches from the page. Clutched beneath the magazine was a torn brown paper bag. It was ripped haphazardly, as though unwrapped in a frenzy of anticipation. I strained my eyes to see the title. The boy's dextrous hands covered all except the familiar "PC GA..." I knew it was PC Gamer, the most widely read magazine for the latest and coolest computer games. Intrigued I peered over the boy's shaven head and military jacket. In a moment I recognised the visuals and the text of the article... Homeworld II. A three page spread. A burst of pride, love, excitement and passion enflamed me. I wanted to run over to the youth and gush that my boyfriend designed Homeworld II. I hopped from foot to foot trying to justify this sort of action, but then I chilled out and just enjoyed the fact that I have the bestest boyfriend in the world and that I'm so gobsmackingly proud and impressed by his cleverness and ability to do amazing things. Yay for my booful!

current mood: delighted

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Thursday, October 9th, 2003
2:34 pm - The White Alabaster Origami Temple

...a few days ago - I
get this stunning, overwhelming dream about you and Morgan, like a bolt of
glitter-covered lightning. The setting is a misty and jasmine scented...Collapse )


Hope the world is spinning right for you this week,

Love,
Christian

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Monday, October 6th, 2003
4:27 pm - Up up and away!
Bye bye honeybun! I think you have left the ground now. ZoooOOOoomming off across the planet. But, don't worry, I'm holding on to the threads of the sky to ensure you arrive home safely. Give Mistress Odysseus P. Cat all of my loving and snuggles. I can't wait to hear of your grand adventures back home. Love you!!

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Saturday, September 6th, 2003
12:54 am - At Sea
Hello my beloved. I'm on a ship! I'm wearing a skull and crossbones t-shirt and was thinking of you. Miss you so much! Wish you were here beside me watching the moonlight dance upon the Caribbean Sea. Off in our fast ship across the oceans. Landing on forgotton shores and dancing beneath the stars. It is such a good moon night! I miss you. I'm thinking about you every moment. I have special treasure for you too! Pirate booty for my baby! I love you more than the wind that blows across the bow and through the night. I hope you get my kiss the next time a gust ruffles your hair. All my love. All my care and hugs and squishes and thoughts and my heart. Always my heart. xoxoxo

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Friday, August 22nd, 2003
7:18 pm - Moments away
Well, a somewhat lengthy moment, but that's not the point. Packing bags, getting ready, flying out the door in 10 hours to start the flying and the zipping and zooming. Will be there 8pm East Coast funk-railroad time, and can barely wait!

Being with my baby, relaxing, camping, generally taking a break from it all AND going nuts the way only we can. Who can ask for better? Not I, and I can ask for a lot.

Hope everyone out there's even 10% as filled with cheer and joy!

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Tuesday, August 19th, 2003
9:24 pm - Love in the sky
In a week's time, at 5:51 a.m. EDT on Aug. 27, 2003 we will be camping in the mountains beside a lake and looking up into the firmament. There we shall find the red planet Mars within 55,758,006 kilometres of Earth. This moment will be the closest that Mars has come to our planet in nearly 60,000 years! I can't wait!

All my starry love and *squishes*

- K

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Sunday, August 17th, 2003
12:20 am - Beginnings in the middle...
It's only seven nights before you arrive for our summer adventures! I've got a bit of the trip planned, but the best thing about us is our indefatigable ability to have fun regardless of what the universe dishes up. We're a high velocity team of superstars ready to devour the world!

On the flip side, this long distance relationship is the hardest thing ever. We may be better at coping with the space after a year, but the pain of being without you is almost too much sometimes. I want to know all the little dumb things that you do, just to imagine you sailing through the world and see myself there, next to you all the way. Waiting in the same line at the cinema to see a crappy movie, going out to a dinner with friends. All the usual stuff. Things that people often take for granted. So frustrating.

I really wish you were here now. I know you'll be arriving soon. But right now I am so stressed out and worrying about my work. I know that some snuggles would take the edge off. You would make me laugh with a silly joke and remind me to not take this world so seriously. I'm addicted to you and the DTs are like razors.

Lucky we have the faith and hope to transubstantiate mountains into molehills. Take care of yourself beloved. I can barely wait for the giant magical sky bird to bring you to me.

Always my love,
- K

current mood: a long way away

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Thursday, February 14th, 2002
2:42 pm - Valentines Day 2002
I first glimpsed Morgan whilst walking to lunch with a mutal friend, Lorenzo. Lorenzo introduced me to this amazing tall, dark handsome stranger with long black dreadlocks, bare feet, incredible smile, sparkling blue-green eyes and a business suit. We said 'hi' and that was it. I went to lunch and interrogated Lorenzo for details.

Apparently he was smart and handsome. However, he was also recently single, so I banished any further hopes of romance. He surely would be relishing his new freedom and be reluctant to get into another relationship. Where as I was ready for something special. I entertained the possibility of meeting him again in a year or so, maybe then...

Roughly two months later I was doing my 'thing' at the goth nightclub, Revelations. Whilst by the door I recognised Morgan coming in and couldn't help but grin. Later that night I was djing my set and played many of my favourite tracks(e.g. 'Stigmata' by Ministry)in the hope that he would dance. Mission successful. He had great taste in music.

I sought him out later in the evening, plied him with drinks and regaled him with tales of my honours thesis. He told me of his open-source internet company and his unbridled enthusiasm for life. He was amazing. We couldn't shut up.

There was an indescribable spiral of energy circulating between us. It was too good to be true. I can't remember much of our conversation except mention of Fight Club, Philip K. Dick and the internal workings of elevators.

I dropped him off at work in the morning and we parted with no phone numbers exchanged. Both of us were wary of starting anything serious. I was happy to let fate do the work.

A few days later I received an email from him. Morgan had tracked me down on this crazy internet thingy. I took this as a good sign and asked him out on a 'date'.

We danced in a water fountain, ate Vietnamese soup, caught a St.Kilda tram, licked ice-creams and rolled down a grassy hill. It was a beautiful night, so I suggested a further adventure... I grabbed a foam mattress and we drove to the beach. Here we settled down within a circle of trees behind the sand. It was whisper quiet and we laid down and watched the stars. I have never seen falling stars like the ones we saw that night. No drug had ever made the universe as incredible as the sky we saw that night. We fell in love.

Our lives became entangled in a mystical journey into the year 2000, year of the dragon and the psychological beginning of the new milennium. A year of wonder and anticipation, excitement and faith in the future. I now had the strength to finally finish my honours year in philosophy and began teaching undergraduates. Morgan wrapped up his open-source company Netizen and began exploring game design as a possible career. We danced, drank, smoked, tripped and laughed our way into the 21st century. Both living with our best friends and benefitting from separate houses in hippie, grungy Brunswick and the beaches and Carnival of St.Kilda.

We were extras in a movie 'Queen of the Damned' and voice presenters for Kiss FM radio. We ran convention role-playing games and twirled fire. By the beginning of 2001, the next adventure was unfolding.

Morgan was offered the dream job as Game Designer for Irrational Games. The only obstacle was it's location in Canberra; eight hours drive from family and friends. He said that he wouldn't go without me, and I said that there was nothing holding me in Melbourne. So we packed our bags and set out upon a new amazing caper.

Now I am two years and two months into the most beautiful relationship of my life. Our lives are once again in flux. Morgan has opportunities in the USA and Canada and I am hoping for acceptance as a graduate student to complete my philosophy PhD. I can't even predict next week. But, I know Morgan will be with me, finishing my sentences and making me laugh. We will keep on having our adventures and having stories to tell.

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Monday, February 14th, 2000
2:38 pm - A Handful of Stars
This is a story that Morgan wrote for me on Valentine's Day 2000. It's been hiding away in the depths of http://vurt.net for a couple of years. I just found it again and had to put it on lj for prosperity... it is very personal, but, you can read it if you wish. :)


She was like a dream, eyes meeting for a moment before passing on
down the street, a glimpse of something else that stuck, etched
into the core of my being.

Perhaps she was a dream, and I am still not awake, sleep walking
in the edges of dreams and those false memories you can never place.
Things you know happened, shadows in the subconcious, oddities that
are our only peek beyond the veil. Or perhaps merely fantasies of
what could have been, would have been or should have been in an
ideal world.

So I trudge my way through my grey world, with nothing but a memory
of a girl with stars in her eyes to make things seem lighter. A
memory I'm not even sure of, really. A memory that won't go away,
a vision burned into the back of my retinas by hope.

Time passes. Things get greyer. I'd tell you about it, but there
seems little point. Writing about bland things is pretty bland in
itself. So I'll move on to the time when things got interesting.

She saw me first this time, glanced me wandering through her lands
and percieved my crossing from her tower. Surrounded by darkness,
trekking through the night and in the distance a beacon of sound and light.

A night of conversation, a sweeping discussion covering everything
from the important to the trivial with equal care. The barely
hidden fascination of getting to know someone, coming to understand
them. Not in full, not every detail, but getting to know where
the depths were, the places worthy of further exploration.

She stepped down to me then, leaning forward from her tower of
dreams. An outstretched hand, a gesture. A stone, held in your
hand, inscribed with a word "Memory". She takes it, holds it and
crushes it, leaving a silvery trace across her palm. Looking
downward I could see the beauty of the points of light, captured
in that grasp. A handfull of stars, each one for me. A million
pinpoints of light, shining through the darkness, spinning in time,
spiraling into the night.

Falling, turning into the darkness, lying on my back and looking
up into the light, starting anew. Theres nothing quite like the
revelation that nothing need be grey, and that we make our own
greyness.

Nothing is bland when you've seen the stars, and this world full
of wonder can never be boring, unless you let it. A gesture from
you and my eyes opened again. There has been joy before, and there
will be joy again to quote an author of some repute.

There are more than two worlds for any person, more than two points
of view, more than two facets of feeling. Ultimately, you find
that which you search for - but sometimes it takes someone else to
help you realise you're looking.

Looking upwards, into the stars.

"Don't you just wish you could take this moment, etch it in stone
and make it permanent?" I said, head lying back looking at the
stars streaming across the sky, looking across at the wonder
reflected in your eyes.

A moment that lasts forever, and a handfull of stars. You are all
these things to me my love, and more. May trouble never cross your
path and may all things come to you in time.

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